“Guys, school is starting after this show.”
“Boys, find the remote and turn off the tv.”
“No you may not watch a show until you practice piano or clean up your room or insert any other task I ask you to do…..”
“you have been awake for 12 seconds; you don’t need to be fighting about what show to watch.”
Do you say these things to your kids? Do you find yourself waiting around for the show to end before your kids can do a specific task? I finally realized that tv was one of the major stresses in our day. Typically, my boys would watch a show each morning. We have had this daily routine since Mr1 was a toddler. We’d wake up and have a sippy cup of milk and watch a show while I’d make breakfast. 3 more boys later and the morning gets taken over by television when everyone gets their own choice of show.
I’m not opposed to tv entirely. I enjoy sitting down and watching a show (This is Us or Pioneer Woman are two of my current faves) We enjoy a family movie night a couple of nights a month but when I found myself waiting to start school or dealing with tears because it was time to get ready for Church and the tv needed to be turned off I knew we needed a change.
It started with punishment but turned into a blessing. Mid-February we had a very cold stretch of weather (14 degrees) so we were really feeling cabin fever but the fighting was getting to be too much so I had to take a drastic measure. So, I took tv away for the time being, It was as simple as that.
Accept the process
So, the first couple of days were rough. Lots of looks of shock and awe when they asked me if they could watch a show and I said no. There were tears, there were time outs to adjust those tears and remind them why they couldn’t. This got better each day and it became easier for me to stick with it each day. Let’s be honest, it’s easier to say yes to their request to watch tv. How do we adults do if our phone breaks or we lose cell reception? We get fussy, annoyed and probably grumpy because we can’t habitually check Facebook.
Now is the time to assess the toys
I highly recommend going through and assessing your toys prior to cutting the tv/technology cord. Weed out toys that aren’t used anymore. You can donate or even start a rotation of tucking certain toys away for a bit. I’m not suggesting anything formal but tossing a few toys in a box and putting it in the basement gives the toys you do keep in your space room to be seen and played with. Since highly simplifying our toys storage and space and clearing out (either donation or consignment) my boys play unprompted much more often than when we had a full toy room in our basement.
The plan
So, this started out with losing it for punishment. After they recovered from the initial withdrawl and the discipline period was over, I reinstated tv on the weekends but the second fighting and grumpiness surfaced it was off. I do allow my little boys to watch a couple of educational shows during school time so both the big boys and I are a bit more focused.
The results
Some wonderful things happened when we cut our tv time. The boys went outside more often. They asked if they could play in the snow after breakfast and before school time. Once I picked my lower jaw up off the floor I said “of course you can!” The fresh air prior to school work did wonders for our cabin fevered bodies and minds! We all started reading much more both individually and group read aloud. Imaginations expanded with Legos, free drawing, and couch cushion forts. When I asked them about the changes, they acknowledged the increased playtime and less fighting over shows. Less tv gave them more opportunities to work together and play individually. My big boys started playing games much more often. Yes, there were still fights but it only emphasized the fact that they do not have to play together all the time. It’s fine to play by yourself and with the extra time without tv in the way they had less pressure to fit it all in.
Suggestions for a smooth transition
If you decide to cut your family tv time good for you!
-Make sure everyone knows the plan. Tell your spouse and even friends and grandparents. It’ll be easier for everyone to be supported by those around you.
-Check on your toy situation and even have a couple of craft projects or outdoor projects in your mental playbook for the first couple of days. Pearler beads, rainbow loom, or another small craft project are great for rainy or winter days when outside play isn’t as possible.
-Make a small amount of tv time count. Plan a family movie night complete with popcorn or a treat. Make it a reward for behavior goal or a challenge that has been met with school work.
-Make sure they have a good example. If you took tv away from the kids but you are constantly on your phone perhaps it’s a good time to evaluate your own technology habits.
If you decide to cut the tv I’m sending you a big high five! Let me know what positive changes happened in your house in the comments below.
Great tips! I know I need to cut my son’s TV time. I let him watch when I’m busy getting dinner ready or doing some other thing he can’t help me with. But it needs to stop.
This is a fantastic post! I love how you included evaluating the toy situation. And I agree, less screen time=happier/content kids!
That’s great that you decide to cut back on screen time. Like you said, the kids learn how to play by themselves and do more productive things with their time!
We’ve recently started cutting back tv for our kiddos. You’ve made a lot of really great points! I’m currently trying to cut down on my phone usage (which is hard because I do a lot of work on my phone) but I think it’s super important especially because our children have zero access to our phones or tablets (they’re much younger than your kiddos) I’ll be saving this for later, since I’m sure we’ll have to cross this bridge at some point when they’re older.
Great tips! Once we get into a screen time habit it’s hard to break
great tips! I really need to work on this with my daughter. she loves TV
i love reading this! i know this sounds simple but i’ve found that the hardest part of limiting screen time is just saying no. once you say no they might groan for a while, but they’ll figure it out.
It’s been great for our family!
I just started cutting my tv time and I thought I would really miss it but I just don’t! Spending actual time with my family has been so much more fun!
These are great tips! We haven’t started any screen time yet (my little one is still under 2), but it’s inspiring to hear how you were able to successfully cut back! I love that they started playing outside more as a result of less TV! That is the exact reason for the push in healthcare to cut back on screen time! Well done Mama!
This is Us or Pioneer Woman are two of my current faves, too! LOL
I usually end up crying or hungry, and thats how you know which one I seen haha.
I have been trying to cut down our time too 🙂
My baby is 17 months old and finally starting to pay attention to the TV for more than 5 minutes and I’m having a hard time knowing what it too much at her age. Some part of me wants her to watch nothing and some of me enjoys seeing her get into a show and become interested. This is such a hard battle. We don’t know what’s right or wrong!!
I do think there is a time and place that tv can help us. I just know I personally keep saying “one more show” to my boys and it got out of hand. They are also older and can occupy themselves differently than a 17 month old. Give yourself grace and do what you have to do. You are doing a great job I’m sure of it!
I have recently been giving my screen time habit more consideration. I definitely rely on it to calm down the toddler whining sometimes and I know that isn’t good. I have braved out a few whining sessions without the TV and we survived, but other times I cave and just turn it on for some kind of peace. But this is inspiring and I am going to keep working at it <3
Great tips!! I know that I need to make an effort to cut screen time. I just noticed the other day how much it is and it needs to be cut for sure.
Since becoming a stay at home mom seven months ago, I have found that we now watch entirely too much tv. I am starting to go through the process of cutting it back. I’m glad to see it’s doable and the kids aren’t going to be terrible about it! I definitely need to work on my craft game though. I know my son loves them, I’m just terrible at thinking of ideas.